The Turkey Song

The Sarah Palin Plan for Winning the Presidency

I got to hand it to Sarah Palin.  Polls showing her disliked by 60% of Americans don't discourage her.  She thinks she can win.  Watching her Republican/Tea Party allies in the House I think I know what her plan is, and maybe it could work.  Do nothing about unemployment, cut off the unemployment extensions.  Do nothing to help our senior citizens,  Cut off health care and shred the entire social safety net--or what's left of it -by cutting the budget or refusing to pass one.  Do nothing about the Americans who are losing homes and repeal Wall Street reform.  Then the 60% of us who don't like her will be out homeless on the streets and have a hard time making to polling places on election day.  Sharp thinking Sarah!

Turduckenfu

Some of you have heard that the ultimate Thanksgiving menu item the the turducken, a turkey, stuffed with a duck, stuffed with a chicken.  But in fact, fellow meat lovers, we can go one better.  Stuff the chicken with tofu.  This is so you can have a tofu dish to feed that vegan that always comes to Thanksgiving dinner and wines about the menu. Happy Turkey Day.

Yer Out

“Yer Out” was the common cry my ears rang with as a child.  Or else the cries “Ball”, and “Strike” rang in my ears.  I was a last to be picked stringer.  And I accordingly hated baseball. I didn’t know the great Babe Ruth struck out more than he connected.  As I was physically as strong as I was also uncoordinated.    It was such a slow game, I complained—which doesn’t explain why I liked chess and go or long hikes in the woods. 

Raised in Seattle, I moved to Santa Cruz, CA at 13, not to return until 43.  I retained into adulthood my dislike of baseball. And so too my love of walking the urban woods, forest, parks and beaches remained intact.

One spring day when I was 19 or twenty I went for a long walk in a Delavega Park, a large park at the edge of Santa Cruz.   The walk took me by the baseball field. A familiar voice called out “Joe” from the field and there I saw two teams forming, both composed of friends of mine.  The surprise at seeing so many friends in on spot beckoned me over. My friend said, ‘We are short a player—can you join one of the teams”. 

I stated categorically and perhaps in the imperative, that I have always hated baseball, and added that I usually struck out, to which the bottom line reply came – we have a keg of beer.  I couldn’t argue with that logic, nor did I protest the utter disregard for city park alcohol rules, which seemed at the moment worthy of disregard.  I immediately joined the game and warmed up my batting arm several times at the keg, enjoying sudsy the comradeship of friends. 

I came up to bat after three pints worth of warm up with my batting arm.  The ball came across from the pitcher, smooth, but fast and I entered into a relationship with it with the same reckless abandon another drinker might apply to a fair young lady.  I suddenly just didn’t care.  I wanted to get it over with and get back to warming up. 

And in that reckless abandon the bat did something totally unexpected.  It hit it dead on and smooth and the ball went flying, through the outfield, over the fence, across the two lane service road, into the bushes and trees between the road and Delavega Creek at park’s boundary.  When he ran down the creek we discovered that the ball had indeed been caught, by a crawfish, which had wrapped its permanently crumpled body around the hardball. On seeing this stunning catch the umpire yelled “Yer Out” which is why I still hate baseball.

Join or Die

These days the Tea Party is dividing our country up and using, or misusing the "Don't Tread on Me," snake from the American Revolution. George Washington would turn over in his grave at the thought of an anti-government movement using that slogan, since as soon as he became our first President he started using government to help the nascent country grow economically. But now the Coffee Party is proposing a new image and slogan from that ear -- also a snake but Ben Franklin's one:

This image originally appeared as a political cartoon in Franklin's Pennsylvania Gazette. While it only showed 8 rather than 13 colonies it was meant as a call for the colonies to unite in action against the British. It was believed at that time that a snake cut apart could reunite itself.

The coffee party is right. It's time to pull our country together to solve our problems. Remember that Tea is not the America drink, we dumped that stuff. Have some coffee instead. The Coffee Party says stop obstructing, join together and use government to solve some of our problems. Accept our demographic changes and work with our immigrants. Have government work for us instead of for the corporations.

There is another slogan from the American Revolution: "We must hang together or we will surely hang separately."

Statement from the founder of the Coffee Party Movement:

Facebook, join the Coffee Party:

http://www.facebook.com/coffeeparty

Home page Coffee Party:

http://www.coffeepartyusa.com/

Wikipedia on our snake:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Join,_or_Die

Later on Late Night Catechism

Some people think that Late Night Catechism1 and 2 are very funny and theologically accurate. Let this curmudgeon tell you that it has twisted the faith and sister will go straight to purgatory for it. But since she will eventually get to heaven, I guess she will get the last laugh after all. Here is a little U-Tube from Late Night Catechism 2.

If you, like the Old Curmudgeon, on rare occasions eat at Jack in the Box, avoid the "hot sauce". Why do they give you the worst hot sauce in the world when you ask for salsa. They keep the real salsa hidden under the counter, and you have to beg for it. Tell them, next time, that that hot sauce causes your head to turn into a styrofoam ball. In the mean time, Jack, take this:

WWRHD

What Would Robin Hood Do? He would vote yes on Washington State Initiative 1098. Last night on KTCS Republican State Chair, Chris Vance suggested that the reason I 1098 is behind in the polls is that it's supports did not play the populist card. In fact they ceded the ground to it's opponents, making the average take payer think it was against their interest to support it. The wealthy opponents of I 1098 have been playing a game of let me load this gun for you so you can shoot yourself in the foot. I for one don't mind saying I'd like to soak the rich!

Have a Cow International!

Why is it that one contribution to a charity and you are a prisoner of their mailing list forever? Four years ago I donated to Heifer International with the proviso that I not be included on there mailing list. Not only did I get several letters requesting further donations but come the following Christmas I received a very expensive and fancy 'Gift Catalog" billed as t"The Most Important Gift Catalog in the World." I have been trying for 3 years to get off there catalog mailing list.

Heifer International tells you that for small donations you can purchase a cow, a goat, chickens etc for a third world village, to put them in the livestock business. If in fact these modest sums were legitimately going for what you had purchased, how do they afford huge sums on glossy mailings and catalogs? I think someone should investigate this supposedly worthy charity.

Madness SS Leaning Tea Party Candidate.

Thanks my friend Mark Shea. In his Blog in the conservative Catholic, National Catholic Register he has denounced both Sharon Angles "second amendment solution" option for Harry Reid and

a little know steeped in tea Republican candidate for Congress Rich Iott, who was recently outed in The Atlantic hanging out with neo-Nazi types doing historical re-enactments of a SS unit.

http://www.theatlantic.com/politics/archive/2010/10/why-is-this-gop-house-candidate-dressed-as-a-nazi/64319/

Marks comments can be found at:

http://www.ncregister.com/blog/in-which-i-again-signal-my-secret-democrat-sympathies

Yeah for you Mark Shea. As a member of the Catholic Worker pro-life progressive communitarian type folks, in return for your insight polarization defusing comments, if you call to my attention some whack job of a similar nature on the left, I'll post something about him on one of my ill-read blogs and or my Facebook page. That's the best I can do in return other than God bless you and see you in the communion line.

I suppose I'm expected to curmudgeon a little now, as that is what this column is about, and so my parting shot is if the Tea Party activists are really going to announce that they will use their second amendment options on Harry Reid and the political and pundit classes don't denounce that, we are already doing a historical reenactment with more gravitas than a bunch of losers in second hand uniforms. We are in reenacting the political slide towards the toal apathy that allowed Hitler to take power in Germany.

Looking for John Lennon

Elvis, apparently has nothing on John Lennon. In fact John , allegedly murdered just shy of 30 years ago is still on the FBI watch list for his anti-war activities. Perhaps as evidence or, to help locate his ghost, in case he has been leaving fingerprints, the FBI has seized a fingerprint card of Lennon from an auction. Maybe the ghost of J. Edgard Hoover, who originally had Lennon investigated is directing this search from beyond the grave

See the New York Times:

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/10/07/arts/music/07lennon.html?_r=1&scp=1&sq=John%20Lennon%20fingerprint%20card&st=cse

Now that you are up to snuff on the case, I'll let you in on a little secret. I know where John Lennon is. I have been examining carefully a video of a car commercial made in Great Britain. The commercial was scrubbed because of a ghostly white image they found moving next to the car. I have found that if you look real closely you will eventually see John Lennon. So just click on "Ghostly Car Ad".

Sarah, Sarah, Sarah, Not Again?

Sarah , the Grizzly Bear Mama is at it again, endorsing more candidates trying to keep America safe for the wealthy few.

She has just endorsed Steve Pearce who is running for Congress in New Mexico, after he flubbed his run for the Senate.

http://www.santafenewmexican.com/Local%20News/Palin-endorses-Pearce-in-NM-congressional-race

But who is this Pearce? Well the oil and gas industry likes him a whole lot, because he likes them.

http://newmexicoindependent.com/64534/pearce-ranks-2-in-nation-for-money-from-oil-and-gas

So Sarah we got one thing to say to you:

Bud Heavy Anyone?

Ever wonder why the brewers of Bud don't name the not "Bud Light" product Bud Heavy? If one is light and they are substantially different the over is heavy is it not. Or maybe Bud "Light is another blatant attempt at manipulation of the consumer mind by product labeling and sneaky ad campaigns. Aren't most of the names and product labels thrown at us some kind of attempt at manipulation of our emotions and reasoning? Come on, admit it they tug our inner strings don't they?

Does Fear Deter Voting?

The New York Times today reported on a pool by the Pew Hispanic Center that in the wake of Arizona's repressive state immigration law, and illegal antics by Sheriff Joe Araipo of Maricopa County there, rather than expressed great interest in turning out to vote against those who are trying outraging their constitutional projects, there interest in voting is declining. Only 32% of registered Latino voters have given this years elections a lot of thought, compared to 50% of all voters nationwide. Is this surprising? No. The level of fear and intimidation, the general prejudice against Hispanic citizens and residents is comparable to the fear and intimidation of African Americans in the South before the civil rights movements. A portion of our population refuses to recognize the legitimacy and humanity of people of Hispanic descent. They are being treated as not one of us. Maybe, in certain places. If they are rejected by "us" they will become afraid of "us" and avoid voting as participation in an unpleasant social environment. Sheriff Joe's bully tactics of rounding up people he vaguely suspects of being illegal, putting them in tents and dressing them in pink pajamas is not unlike making someone wear a Star of David. Wake up America, we are perpetrating fear and intolerance again!

Drive By Wavers

What gives with the cheery faces of certain Seattle drivers. In the past several years I have had several near hits as a pedestrian crossing the street, often by people who plowed threw downtown intersections as the light changed. One of the worst was on Roosevelt St. crossing with a friend. A long line of traffic obscured the vision up the street with large vehicles, but the last lane was empty for a space. We stepped out into it when a car broke from the pack and went high speed at us, forcing us to step back. He waived and grinned. Not the last time the driver by speeder has waived. What do they expect, that you will waive and grin back. Gee thanks buddy I needed the exercise dodging the traffic. Lets do it again sometime.

Pizza Anyone?

This aging fellow lives in a rooming house in a young area with lots of Pizza delivers. I have an outside entry to my room which of course lacks an address which has been frequently knocked on by pizza pushers who, unable to find their address assume it to be a door without one. So I have put up a sign reading, This room occupied by an old curmudgeon who didn't order the dang pizza."

Now the idiots knock and ask directions!

Your Hancock Seeger!

Pete Seeger, America's greatest living folk music legend is 91 years old now, respectably older and less of a curmudgeon than himself. He is still chopping his firewood everyday but according to the New York Times he dreads one task. To those who write asking for his autograph he sends a form letter decrying collecting autographs as foolishness. A bit of curmudgeon in him. Well Pete I think I'll send you a letter saying I don't mind the form letter, but don't forget to sign it.

For more on Pete from the New York Times:

http://olcurmudgeonseys.blogspot.com/

And for what I have said of him on another blog:

http://notesjotsflics.blogspot.com/2009/02/this-land-is-your-land.html

Donald Quacks the Truth

Try this link for a cartoon were Donald Duck gets caught up in Glenn Beck pseudo populism, then wises up.

http://www.firstthings.com/blogs/firstthoughts/2010/10/03/when-donald-duck-meets-glenn-beck/

Glenn Beck isn't all he's quacked up to be.

Prognosticating the Count

There has been a lot of controversy generated from the pundit mills and Republican push pollsters aimed at producing a Republican landslide before it happens. In this version of events the party that has abandoned America's favorite beverage for extreme tea is a shoe in to capture both houses of Congress. Me thinks they are counting chickens before the eggs are even fertilized.

For those of you who want to switch back to America's favorite beverage try this:

http://www.coffeepartyusa.com/

This brew can also be found on Facebook!

Ol' Curmudgeon lying down on the job. Or just taking a different angle on things.

Do Not Cut Out the Charm of Using More Words

Some young writers invent incorrect contractions or use them excessively. Do not you know young one that many contractions, one upon the other, is a sign of labor?

Don't Run Me Over

Some Seattle pedestrians don't mind playing chicken on the idea of maybe running down a pedestrian crossing the intersection. But I notice when my arthritis in the knee was so pad for a while I was using a cane, they don't think it's fair game to bear down on a guy with a cane. What do you think guys...would it be fair of me to keep a cane just for crossing the intersection?

Outa My Way Ya Old Dog

Why don't people take the hint? A few days ago as I walked with my shopping cart down the sidewalk I came upon a woman with her leashed dog sprawling the sidewalk. I looked at the dog who was looking blankly at me and said don't worry boy, I won't run you over. The woman stood holding the leash for 2 minutes before the dog got smart!

Say What Ms. O'Donnell?

Delaware Republican Senate hopeful, Ms. Christine O'Donnell, gave an advanced lesson on biology back in 1998 (we await her wisdom with baited breath) explaining the "myth" of evolution by saying "Why aren't monkeys still evolving into humans?" Why didn't someone tell her back then, "Au contraire, you provide evidence that they are."

Check it out on U-Tube:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KB0TLgcNesU